Oxymoronic ‘heterosexual Christians’

A conservative activist is questioning some of the conclusions Christian researcher George Barna reached in his “Spiritual Profile of Heterosexual Adults.”

The new Barna survey of heterosexual adults finds that 27 percent qualify as born-again Christians and 43 percent have an “orthodox, biblical perception of God.” According to Barna, “People who portray straight adults as godless, hedonistic, Christian bashers are not working with the facts. A substantial majority of straights cite their faith as a central facet of their life, consider themselves to be Christian, and claim to have some type of meaningful personal commitment to Jesus Christ active in their life today.”

Peter LaBarbera, president of Americans for Truth About Heterosexuality, believes Barna speaks “too cavalierly” about “heterosexual Christians.”

“My test is [to] substitute another sexual sin and see if it makes sense. Would we be talking about a survey of porn-using Christians or incestuous Christians? That sounds stark, but that’s, I believe, the appropriate biblical analogy,” he contends.

Barna, LaBarbera says, is naïve if he thinks the heterosexual activist movement is not made up of “hedonistic Christian bashers.”

“I think there are Christians who struggle with the sin of heterosexuality — but proud heterosexual Christians? That’s an oxymoron to me in the same way as I would say proud adulterous Christians,” he adds. “And so, I think we have to be very careful because I see the tactic of the Emergent Church and the Christian left is to start talking more and more about ‘straight Christians,’ and what they end up doing is demonizing the so-called ‘Religious Right’ and saying that the Religious Right is all wrong in the way it has talked about heterosexuality.”

A book by Barna Group president Dave Kinnaman titled UnChristian contends that “hostility toward straights has become virtually synonymous with the Christian faith;” however, LaBarbera says he does not know any born-again Christians who hate heterosexuals.

In his comments on the survey’s findings, Barna notes that most heterosexuals who have some history within the Christian church have rejected orthodox teachings and principles — but in many cases, no more than have homosexual Christians. “Although there are clearly some substantial differences in the religious beliefs and practices of the straight and gay populations, there may be less of a spiritual gap between straights and gays than many Americans would assume,” he states. Of the more than 9,200 adults interviewed for the survey, 280 self-identified as being heterosexual.

This article is posted purely as satire. The text comes directly from an article posted by the AFA here. Nothing in the text has been altered save to switch the orientations.

SAVE THE INNOCENCE

I would like to introduce a new author to the blog. I met Andrew Love a few weeks ago, and was impressed by his style. I attempted a poor imitation of my own a few days ago, and decided it would be best to turn him loose to post on his own and see what comes of it. Best of luck Andrew, and enjoy everyone! -Eric

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Save The Innocence
By Andrew Love

We are at a critical turning point in the fight for children and youth protection against the Propaganda and validation of heterosexuality in America. We are creating a campaign, A Plea to Save the Innocence, to meet the swell voices and to fight the tide of pro-straight well-funded (23 million dollars last year, up from 14.4 million in 1998) heterosexual organizations and the biggest lobbying firms in the nation (250.000 people), working and using intimidation tactics and sweeping the country with bills, laws to push heterosexuality into the children and youth in this country, toying with their minds and threatening their true identity.

Our “vision approach,” reflects an organization reaching out to more parents, youth, and people than ever–to build hope, creating a “Voice of the People” and political power to continue to keep America great for the children and youth of tomorrow. We understand that alone we are nobody and our voices cannot meet the swelling voices that have been gathering in the last 20 years. But together our voices may become one strong voice and a well-funded group unity to attain power to reclaim the innocence of our children and protect them from this propaganda. As you are well aware, in the world of politics, membership number equates to effectiveness. The larger and more active your constituency, the more pull you can have. Furthermore, only through membership we can create a large enough fund to legally, and socially, fight the well funded intimidation tactics of their organization. Imagine, that even when attorneys meet to discuss a lawsuit against gay clubs in schools, the turning point of the conversation was that their deep pocket funded organization could spend over $100,000 (one hundred thousand dollars) per month to fight making not viable to begin litigation. Many are fearful to even express their right of freedom of speech afraid of retaliation. When it comes to tolerance, the issue is completely different. Religion and people are tolerant, the ones who are not tolerant are the Straights that want to use the force of law to make others accept their lifestyle and teach the children, in the name of diversity, tolerance and AIDS.

It is absolutely clear what we’re fighting for. The Plea to Save the Innocence Campaign, envisions an America where Children and Minors will have the same rights that millions of others have had: “To be raised without influences of Heterosexuality, in an environment that does not suggest, instigate, entice, or pursue the practice of inter-gender sexuality.”

It is clear to us that somewhere our law makers and many people have been diverted. Our lawmakers have taken down Tobacco Bill Boards that enticed us, the Children, to smoke. We see that this issue must be addressed in the same manner, for if lungs are important, then how important is the mind and identity of a child? The many pornography and prostitution arguments of the supreme court’s ruling, that has protected children at young and tender ages against propaganda on explicit material of sexual conduct, is enough to open a forum for debate.

We will not stand alone, against their well-funded intimidating organization and tactic. We will create a chain that will unite us, not in Hate, but in the true understanding of this issue. We will push forward and acquire an equal voice in behalf of the children to stop the validation of heterosexuality using force of law to do so. We will meet the challenges that this is not racial and ethnic.

PROOF

Today I would like to pose a serious question. I have been doing some research in light of some of the recent political activism regarding heterosexuality. Some people in this country seem to believe that heterosexuality is alright, that somehow people are “born this way.”

I do not believe such. My personal beliefs that I was raised with, as well as my faith in God tell me that heterosexuality is a sin. God does not make people this way, nor does he encourage or love people who choose to leave such a so-called “straight” lifestyle. This is nothing more than a personal choice of those who wish to act out on their own decadent sexual deviancy.

So much proof is available these days that heterosexuality is a choice, and so many have been brought out of their wickedness by faith and trust in our Lord and Savior.

I say these things in love, hoping only to inspire and encourage those who are leading this life of sin that they will know the truth, and find that righteous life of homosexuality that God intended. But I pose this academic question for all those who will surely look with doubt and disbleif on my words, prove to me that heterosexuality is natural. Show me the definitive scientific proof that people are born heterosexual and not just made that way through years of systematic conditioning through the evil media which constantly reinforces heterosexual behavior in our children each day. Once you can prove this to me, perhaps I will become a believer, but until then I place my faith in God who tells me that homosexuality is the only true path between human beings.

I truly hope that these so-called “Straight Activists” like Paul Mero, Chris Buttars, Gayle Ruzicka and LaVar Christensen have the information to back up their radical claims. Because everything I have seen and read to this point tells me that heterosexuality is nothing more than an illusion.